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Eternal Darkness

24 Mar

Sweat and blood drip down,
“…over soon…”
Daemons know the pain; they’ll never stop.
Reminiscence smiles, but vision blurs and reality hits me hard
“…love gone…”

Yet I must atone for our sins

The last of trifecta, I poured my heart into it (rather more literally than was asked as you can see 😉 ). This one was really hard as I cut out word by word trying my best to replace them with punctuation.
I saw once that life was like a bus: people get on and off your bus but leave memories; I’m glad we shared some time together and hope to travel with you guys again maybe sometime.
I also want to help trifecta for making me a better writer in the short time I have spent here.
On that note, goodbye, fare well trifecta and all.

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19 Comments

Posted by on 24 March 2014 in Banzaï, Trifecta

 

Tags: , ,

19 responses to “Eternal Darkness

  1. debseeman

    25 March 2014 at 02:48

    Dark and very sad. Very good write.

     
    • imab00kworm

      25 March 2014 at 18:11

      Thank you! I was feeling deep… Double meaning again (deep –> hell) :p

       
  2. jannatwrites

    25 March 2014 at 06:20

    You certainly did lay it all out there for this one! I like the last line, but it’s a losing endeavor….is there any way to fully atone our sins?

     
    • imab00kworm

      25 March 2014 at 18:16

      I hope there is Janna, in this story though it seems impossible… maybe one day the daemons will really leave him alone, deeming him finally worthy of peace 🙂

       
  3. Christine

    25 March 2014 at 19:02

    Ooof, this is dark indeed! “Reminiscence smiles…” I love this. Wonderful job. And thanks for the bus analogy – that’s a great way to look at it. I’m just hoping many of us will continue to travel the same bus routes. 🙂

     
    • imab00kworm

      26 March 2014 at 15:28

      Thank you, unfortunately “I see you smile” didn’t fit with the word limit so I had to find another of depicting it :p glad you liked it!
      I hope so too 🙂

       
  4. theinnerzone

    26 March 2014 at 15:21

    Dark, sad and powerful. I can see your heartstrings tugged by words!

     
    • imab00kworm

      26 March 2014 at 15:31

      Endings are sad, but sometimes forever can be sad too, here the contrast wasn’t happy endings or new beginnings but a sad forever… or maybe I was just sad and that thought came after :/

       
  5. KymmInBarcelona

    26 March 2014 at 15:41

    Oooh, nicely bled!
    I look forward to finding you again in cyberspace : )

     
  6. atrm61

    28 March 2014 at 09:36

    Oh,this was powerful and dark-loved it!

     
    • imab00kworm

      28 March 2014 at 22:29

      I’m glad you enjoyed it 🙂

       
      • atrm61

        29 March 2014 at 06:53

        🙂

         
  7. Renada Styles

    28 March 2014 at 22:55

    I always love a dark read. Exquisite.

     
    • imab00kworm

      29 March 2014 at 11:52

      why thank you, coming from you (having seen YOUR dark reads) I’m flattered 🙂

       
  8. trifectawriting

    30 March 2014 at 19:48

    You put your blood on the page! We couldn’t ask for more. Thanks for sharing your words with us, we’re glad you joined this little community. Good luck and happy writing!

     
    • imab00kworm

      31 March 2014 at 16:16

      Thank you! Good luck to you two (too) 😉

       

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