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YeahWrite Summer 2014-Nightime Runaway

21 Jul

I burst forwards, using the trees as leverage. Movement behind me. I turn around in mid air and release a wave of magical heat, vaporizing the vegetation, illuminating the night with deadly flames. I turn back around to face the right direction, ignoring the movement in my peripheral vision, renewing my momentum with the nearest branch. Screeches of rage erupt from the flames behind me. Shivers crawl up my spine. I mustn’t let fear take over. Focus! Focus on the trees before you, not the shadows behind!

Tree. Right foot on the branch, left foot forwards. Eyes spotting for the next stepping stone. Burst of energy through the right heel. Left foot anticipating the next branch. Arms stabilizing the jumps and ready to fire death upon anything that gets too close. Spot. Land. Jump. Repeat.

How long I ran? Who knows? I came down to a stop when the trees did, at the edge of a cliff. It was too dark to see the bottom. My exhaustion could be heard in my breath. Soon, shadows landed around me, four colourful dots in each silhouette’s face. Their long arms nearly reached their feet. Their strange necks twisted around as they observed me. These things had haunted me, manipulated me ever since I escaped their lair, down in the depths of the earth. Then again, I had stolen something from them. Now they had cornered me, at the edge of a cliff, so far from civilisation that none will hear me scream. They waited, patiently. I spat a cuss, realising the predicament I was in. Slowly, I reached inside my pouch and took the artefact out. I laid the mysterious stone on the ground before me, the green runes eerily illuminating the grass.

One of the SoulEaters roared out of what seemed like satisfaction. The creature straight across from me stepped forward and grabbed the stone. I didn’t stop however and kept walking towards me. I tried to move away but I was paralyzed, held in place by a cold, invisible hand. It stopped before me. It rose the stone up to its mouth and breathed on it. The stone vaporised, revealing a bright green light within, like an emerald star encased a body of rock, floating in the monstrous palm of the creature. I shut my eyes.

I was fighting the dread rising within. Be logical. If it wanted you dead, you’d be dead! Then why keep you alive? Logic. Fear. Hope. Fear. Confidence. Fear…. Fear.

The familiar tingle of magical runes on my skin interrupted the mental ballet. The creature’s palm was next to my abdomen, the green light illuminating my doublet. Before I realised what was happening, the green star traversed my clothes, phasing through my skin and logging itself within me. A wave of excruciating pain crashed on my body. I heard myself scream. The invisible hand let me go soon after. My legs refused to obey my brain, and I fell to the floor. I saw the feet of the SoulEaters vanish. I wanted to scream, to move, but my muscles shut down, as if the pain had fried my nervous system. My eyelids felt like they weighed a ton. They shut despite my best efforts. I was drifting away from reality. The last sensory stimuli I remember came from my ears. “Am I dying?” a shaky, girlish voice said.

No. It wasn’t death. Dreams of terrible creatures chased me through my mind. Memories that didn’t belong to me flowed into my mental river. I saw a boat through a familiar explorer’s eyes. I saw a boy through the eyes of a mother. I saw a house through the eyes of an architect. I was somehow conscious of memories of those that had fallen prey to the SoulEaters. That green light gave me the collective knowledge of hundreds of people, as if I had a sensory library within me, one I could access at will. I was painfully floating back towards reality when I became conscious of the green star’s second gift: I felt a huge, distant reserve of dark power stored within my abdomen. I was focusing on it when the rising sun forced me out of the nightmare.

I realised the ground below me wasn’t grass but sand. The eerie silence of the mountain gave way to the quiet harmony of waves on a beach. The star within me produced a name: Egora, thousands of miles from where I fell unconscious.

::……………..PoWeR//PURPOSE//………………TOOL//VeCtOr.of.WILL//::……………………………………..::

Hello yeahwrite! For those of you not familiar with me (and the many of you who probably forgot), I am running a fantasy series on this blog. This is part three. You’ll find the previous part here, and the whole thing here. Thank you for stopping by, I hope you enjoyed! As always, your thoughts, criticism, and opinions are welcome.

PS: For those who remember the comment section of pt 2, yeah, I’m gonna make this character a girl…

PSS: Bookworm is gonna be at least less active, and at most completely absent from the blogosphere for the next two weeks. She’s out in what some people call “nature”. It’s a strange place where things happen without human intervention or wifi. Crazy right? So you guys are stuck with me for a while… Take that as you will.

PSSS: Isn’t it supposed to be PPS and PPPS, as in post post scriptum, and post post post scriptum?

PSSSS/PPPPS: If you are still reading, congrats! You have just received the Dwagon Seal of Awesome. Now you can brag in the comment section.

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26 Comments

Posted by on 21 July 2014 in Dragonspark, Speakeasy

 

Tags: , ,

26 responses to “YeahWrite Summer 2014-Nightime Runaway

  1. Celine Jeanjean

    21 July 2014 at 09:35

    The action sequence in the second paragraph is really well done, sharp, crisp, to the point. That was my favourite part of this piece. 🙂
    And I shall proudly display my Dwagon Seal of Awesome on my virtual mantlepiece 😉

     
    • DragonSpark

      21 July 2014 at 09:41

      Thank you for being such an awesome reader Celine. I’m glad you like where I went with this. And congrats on the seal!

       
  2. tnkerr

    22 July 2014 at 12:17

    Nicely done. My Dwagon Seal arrived but it is still too hot to touch.Seems to cool down rather slowly.

     
    • DragonSpark

      22 July 2014 at 12:20

      Did you get the “Forged from Dragonfire” special edition? Those tend to do that…

       
  3. my white picket life

    23 July 2014 at 07:23

    This is my first time here. I loved your story and was glad to see there are more parts to it! As Celine mentioned, the second paragraph is superb. While reading it I felt like *I* was the one doing the action. Finally, I’m always looking for lines that are widely applicable and full of wisdom. You didn’t disappoint. I’ll be repeating this to myself sometimes: “Focus on the trees before you, not the shadows behind.”

     
    • DragonSpark

      23 July 2014 at 14:17

      Well firstly, welcome to the club! Your thoughtful comment is much appreciated. I’m glad people are liking that paragraph. I myself wasn’t too sure of how it looks, but seeing that it seems to work with the reader, I might use a similar structure again soon. As far as that line goes, I never had real life application in mind while writhing it, but I’m glad you found new purpose in this humble set of words.
      Thank you for stopping by! Hope to see you ’round soon.

       
      • Melanie L.

        23 July 2014 at 19:53

        Yep, I love that line too.

         
    • Jennifer G. Knoblock

      23 July 2014 at 16:18

      I love that line, too. Words to live by. 🙂

       
  4. Jennifer G. Knoblock

    23 July 2014 at 16:18

    Oh, I really like the action in this, too. Those short lines that keep us tense and moving with you. I love the wise and logical inner voice. Also love, “The familiar tingle of magical runes on my skin interrupted the mental ballet.” I’m ready to read more!

     
    • DragonSpark

      24 July 2014 at 12:35

      Thank you for the kind compliment, and please, be my guest. Two parts are already on this blog and the fourth one is in progress…

       
  5. Blake

    23 July 2014 at 21:21

    I really enjoyed how this story kind of burst into the open (as if sharing the narrator’s desperate energy) and didn’t slow down until her capture, when it became tense and foreboding. Plus there are some wonderful lines scattered through it, e.g. “Memories that didn’t belong to me flowed into my mental river.” So, I’d say this is my favourite among the stories I’ve read by you up to now 🙂

     
    • DragonSpark

      24 July 2014 at 13:16

      Awesome! I’m glad you liked the way I did this. Thanks for stopping by!

       
  6. Danielle

    24 July 2014 at 15:54

    Wonderful imagery. I especially love the first paragraph, so alive.

     
    • DragonSpark

      24 July 2014 at 23:33

      Thank you! Glad you liked that bit.

       
  7. Renada Styles

    24 July 2014 at 22:13

    Such a fantastic story! You snared me from the start. And the way you portrayed the emotion, of fear and pain, well done!

     
    • DragonSpark

      24 July 2014 at 23:34

      A compliment about emotion coming from you means more than you know! Thanks.

       
  8. inNateJames

    24 July 2014 at 22:30

    I really liked the three things the narrator saw when she thought she was dying: I saw a boat through a familiar explorer’s eyes. I saw a boy through the eyes of a mother. I saw a house through the eyes of an architect. The perspectives you take the reader through here took me out of the reality you created and made me feel like I was tripping along with the character. Very good writing, DS!

     
    • DragonSpark

      24 July 2014 at 23:36

      Awesome compliment. Thank you for stopping by. I’m glad you liked it!

       
  9. Meg

    25 July 2014 at 19:43

    This was really lovely: “Memories that didn’t belong to me flowed into my mental river. I saw a boat through a familiar explorer’s eyes. I saw a boy through the eyes of a mother. I saw a house through the eyes of an architect. “

     
    • DragonSpark

      26 July 2014 at 08:37

      Actually, can I ask a question: What makes this one any good? I didn’t give it much thought but it seems to resonate with people…

       
      • Meg

        26 July 2014 at 13:57

        Your writing seems to be much stronger in this one, and more natural. Sometimes the ones you don’t give much thought end up being the best. Maybe you let your internal editor go?

         
  10. Esther

    25 July 2014 at 22:11

    Wow, lots of dynamic energy going on here! You had one riveted reader here! 😉

     
    • DragonSpark

      26 July 2014 at 08:37

      Awesome! I’m glad you liked it. Thanks for stopping by and see you ’round!

       
  11. Michael

    25 July 2014 at 22:35

    I really liked the “Tree” paragraph. That was a brilliant action sequence. I will have to go back and catch up with the previous parts. Serials are super fun, am I right? 🙂

     
    • DragonSpark

      26 July 2014 at 08:39

      Haha awesome, I’m glad you liked it. As of writing these words, the series isn’t nearly as long or as funny as yours, but I hope you’ll like it nonetheless. And yea, series are da bomb!

       

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