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Revelations

08 Sep

She couldn’t remember the last time she’d seen the stars. All she could see was his face. The way she’d gotten his trust, lured him out and rid the world of one more evil. Her purpose was to root out evil and put humans back on the right path. She had gone to this daemon, something they would call “vampire” and gained his trust until the day she convinced him to come outside. The Sun was rising and as soon as the light hit his face she saw his once bright eyes lose their lustre as his face become even paler. He was dead before his skin started to burn and there was no light in his bright blue eyes, she never knew daylight could be so violent!
Something had gone horribly wrong, she was supposed to purge the world but this man had not been the monster he was supposed to be; now that killing him was no longer taking up all her thoughts she realised that she had felt with him a closeness she had never experienced before and she knew then that she had been tainted. She tried to climb back to Heaven, the place with a thousand happy faces but she kept seeing his dead one with no light in those bright blue eyes and now she was stuck in that place between Heaven and Earth because she had pitied a man who deserved Hell. Now she vacillated between up or down, the world no longer making any sense. She had failed and now that she was no longer pure she must fall in turn. Her small hands no longer held on and her frail wings failed her as she plummeted, the long fall down to Earth made it impossible to think anything was real anymore. 
And yet, God decided to save her, and in a church so far down below choir boys gaped as they caught a falling angel…

………………………………… nolightnolightinyourbrightbleueyesineverknewdaylightcouldbesoviolent………………

Whoever chooses the music has good taste! And after having tried to sing “No Light No Light” I now respect Florence (and the machine but I’m not sure it sings) even more because I realised that the song is at that pitch between two voices (the quiet high one and the normal one, I know what they’re called in French but not in English) and she has a good control over her voice. I have already trained myself with “bring me to life” by Evanescence (which killed my voice after the first time I properly sang it) so I managed to sing this right after about three or four times; it’s never perfect though 🙂

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29 Comments

Posted by on 8 September 2014 in Banzaï, Speakeasy

 

29 responses to “Revelations

  1. tnkerr

    9 September 2014 at 00:11

    I like the fallen angel idea. Nicely done.

     
    • imab00kworm

      9 September 2014 at 06:11

      Thank you 🙂

       
    • imab00kworm

      9 September 2014 at 11:19

      Going back to this comment (I didn’t have much time this morning) I want to say that I used the word “falling” rather than “fallen” because I believe that they don’t mean the same thing; this one can still be saved and wants to do good whereas a fallen angel has (in a way) “turned to the dark side”. But maybe that’s just me…

       
      • tnkerr

        9 September 2014 at 12:12

        I understand and that is a valid distinction. Well chosen.

         
      • imab00kworm

        9 September 2014 at 12:32

        🙂

         
  2. katybrandes

    9 September 2014 at 19:37

    I love how you incorporated the images from the video! And I also appreciate the distinction between “fallen” and “falling” you made in your previous comment. Very apropos.
    Florence is wonderful. If you’re not familiar with her earlier work, you should definitely check it out.

     
    • imab00kworm

      10 September 2014 at 06:38

      Thank you 😀
      I’ll have to look her up then ^^

       
  3. MamaMickTerry

    9 September 2014 at 22:37

    I loved your falling angel and that she was caught by the choir boys. I also appreciate your explanation of falling vs fallen in the comments. I’m also very envious that you have a voice sweet enough to tackle the song 😉

     
    • imab00kworm

      10 September 2014 at 11:54

      Hehe, my voice isn’t very sweet but thank you. It’s a fun song to sing once you’ve worked out how to sing it 🙂

       
  4. Christine

    9 September 2014 at 22:59

    Nice description of someone caught between right and wrong. I love the last line – so evocative.

     
  5. Marissa Bergen

    10 September 2014 at 18:15

    Spooky with a bit of sci-fi. Interesting take on the theme!

     
    • imab00kworm

      10 September 2014 at 19:04

      Thanks 🙂 (sci-fi?)

       
      • Marissa Bergen

        10 September 2014 at 19:40

        Now that I reread, I guess it is really more fantasy than sci-fi. Honestly I often get the two confused in my mind as they are so often intertwined.

         
      • imab00kworm

        10 September 2014 at 19:43

        Ok, you just confused me a bit ^^

         
  6. DragonSpark

    10 September 2014 at 18:16

    Nicely done friend! At first it thought you were going for the façade utopian ideal archetype (as in she realizes that Vampires aren’t all 100% evil, and hence God/Heaven might not be 100% good either, forcing Heaven to purge the “taint”/truth…) But then God saved her, so it was like a double twist! Congrats on the write, and sorry for not being able to post this week (Soooo much HW T_T)

     
    • imab00kworm

      10 September 2014 at 19:07

      😀
      You don’t have to be sorry for wanting to get good marks :p good luck with that homework, mine’s starting to pile up :/

       
  7. inNateJames

    11 September 2014 at 02:43

    I was listening to the song obsessively too. My coworkers had to shush me! Intriguing that your narrator realizes her misplaced trust after he turns into a daemon. Glad she had people to catch her at the end, though.

     
    • imab00kworm

      11 September 2014 at 07:13

      Actually she was supposed to kill him because he was a daemon and then she realises he was more than just an evil creature :/ maybe I didn’t make it clear enough…
      I don’t like sad endings and I was kind of following the video.

       
  8. Love Happy Notes - Daily Fun and Inspiration

    11 September 2014 at 05:51

    I would see empathy as a part of goodness so I’m glad she was caught at the end!

     
    • imab00kworm

      11 September 2014 at 07:14

      Yeah that was kind of where I was going 😀

       
  9. Suzanne

    11 September 2014 at 15:29

    I love her introspection and the way you’ve incorporated the lyrics, especially the one about daylight being so violent. Very clever! (Oh, and I usually pick the music – so thank you!) 🙂

     
    • imab00kworm

      11 September 2014 at 18:12

      Yeah I kind of stuck to the video an lyrics, I wanted to do something about the violent daylight in contrast to the “bright” eyes with “no light” so thanks, I’m glad it worked out well 🙂
      (No problem, thank you for the music ^^)

       
  10. Blake

    12 September 2014 at 20:17

    I particularly like the little details you add that turn a mythical fantasy story into something that feels more intimate and personal, e.g. the fact that “Her small hands no longer held on” and the “gaping” of the choirboys – it makes the whole story more touching.

     
    • imab00kworm

      12 September 2014 at 22:15

      Thank you! I need to focus on adding a little more of those details sometimes 😉

       
      • Blake

        12 September 2014 at 23:19

        I always think it’s those little humanising touches that help to draw a reader in. That’s why I enjoyed them here 😉

         
      • imab00kworm

        13 September 2014 at 08:59

        Thanks 🙂

         
  11. Splendid Empress

    13 September 2014 at 01:19

    I loved the way you used the violent daylight line and the image of her falling through the ceiling into the arms of the choir boys. Nice!

     

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